One of the most effective ways to overcome anxiety is to gradually face what you have been avoiding, while learning to calm your body and question anxious thoughts. These skills come from therapy, and you can start practising them on your own. If anxiety is affecting your studies or work, online therapy for anxiety can help you practise them with support. Below are six steps, along with signs that it is time to get extra help.
What anxiety is, and why it is not your enemy
Anxiety is your body’s alarm system. When your brain senses a threat, it prepares you to act: your heart beats faster and your muscles tense. This response is useful when there is real danger. The problem starts when the alarm goes off too often, or for things that are not dangerous, such as sending a message or speaking in class.
Trying to overcome anxiety does not mean getting rid of it completely. A little anxiety helps you prepare and stay alert. The goal is to turn the volume down so it stops running your life.
Common signs of anxiety
Anxiety affects both the body and the mind. You might notice:
- A racing heart or tight chest
- Shallow breathing or feeling short of breath
- Constant worry that is hard to switch off
- Trouble falling asleep
- Feeling on edge or easily irritated
- Avoiding places or people because they make you nervous
If several of these sound familiar and have lasted for weeks, the free anxiety test on this site can give you a clearer picture. It is not a diagnosis, but it can help you decide whether to speak to someone.
How to overcome anxiety: 6 steps that help
1. Stop avoiding what scares you, gradually
Avoidance is one of the main things that keeps anxiety going. When you skip the party or stay silent in a meeting, you feel relief straight away. But your brain learns that the situation was dangerous, so the fear grows next time. The way out is to face it in small steps. Start with something slightly uncomfortable and stay with it until the anxiety starts to settle. Then move to the next step. In therapy this is called exposure, and it is one of the most effective tools for anxiety.
2. Slow your breathing down
When you are anxious, your breathing gets fast and shallow, which tells your body the alarm is real. Slowing your breath sends the opposite message. Try breathing in through your nose for a count of four, then out slowly through your mouth for a count of six. A longer out-breath helps your body move out of alarm mode. Practise it when you are calm too, so it comes easily when you need it.
3. Question the anxious thought
Anxiety tends to predict the worst. When you notice a thought like “I will embarrass myself”, pause and ask: What is the evidence for this? What would I say to a friend who thought this? You are not trying to force positive thinking. You are looking for a more balanced view. This is a core part of cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT).
4. Look after the basics
Sleep and food can have a big effect on anxiety. A tired, hungry body is quicker to sound the alarm. Regular meals help keep your energy steady, and moving your body each day, even a short walk, can help release tension. If you notice that tea or coffee makes you jittery, cut back, especially later in the day.
5. Avoid quick fixes that make it worse
Smoking or scrolling for hours can feel like they take the edge off, but they often leave you feeling worse later. The NHS guidance on anxiety also advises against using alcohol or drugs to cope, as these can harm your mental health over time.
6. Talk to someone you trust
Keeping anxiety to yourself can make it feel bigger. Saying “I have been feeling really anxious lately” to a friend or family member can bring real relief. In many families in Pakistan, worry is brushed off with “you think too much”. If that has been your experience, it can help to speak to someone outside the family who understands anxiety.
How to calm an anxiety attack in the moment
An anxiety attack can feel frightening, but it will pass. If you feel one building:
- Remind yourself that this is anxiety, and it is not dangerous
- Breathe slowly, with a longer out-breath than in-breath
- Plant your feet on the floor and notice the ground under you
- Name a few things you can see around you to bring your attention back to the room
If your mind keeps spinning afterwards, these steps to stop overthinking can help.
What about social anxiety?
Social anxiety is a strong fear of being judged or embarrassed in front of others. It is more than shyness. People with social anxiety may avoid eating in public or speaking up in class because the fear feels overwhelming. The same steps above apply, especially gradual exposure, but many people find social anxiety easier to work through with a therapist.
When to get professional help
Self-help is a good start, but it is not always enough. Consider speaking to a psychologist if anxiety is stopping you from studying or working. It is also worth reaching out if you have been trying on your own for a while without much change.
Individual therapy helps you understand what drives your anxiety and practise the steps above with support, at a pace that feels manageable. Sessions take place online, so you can join from home.
If you are wondering about medication, only a medical doctor such as a psychiatrist can prescribe it. Knowing the difference between a psychologist and a psychiatrist can help you decide who to see.
Frequently asked questions
How do I let go of anxiety?
Letting go of anxiety usually works better when you stop fighting it. Notice the feeling and let it be there while you carry on with what you were doing. Over time, anxiety loses some of its power when you stop treating it as an emergency.
Can anxiety be cured completely?
Anxiety is a normal human emotion, so it never disappears entirely. What can change is how strong and frequent it is. Many people learn to manage anxiety so well that it no longer gets in the way of their life.
What is the 3-3-3 rule for anxiety?
It is a quick grounding exercise that uses your senses and your body to pull your attention back to the room when anxiety spikes. The same technique can also help you stop overthinking at night.
Online therapy for anxiety
You do not have to work through anxiety alone. Khud Aagahi offers online therapy for anxiety with a clinical psychologist, for teenagers and adults across Pakistan. Send a message on WhatsApp at +92 330 8582464 or book a free 15-minute consultation online.